Active Band Man Chats - Tarot Card Fortunes for... Effect Pedals!?

How About This Time?

Fortune-telling!

Wait, haven't we done this a few times already?

Fortune-telling!

No, seriously—

Look, I’ve read Tarot for over 10,000 people. As a seasoned Tarot reader—

Yeah, yeah, we know. You’ve mentioned that, like, a lot.

Even though I’m a fortune-teller, I have nothing else to say!

Oh, I see where this is going.

I grew up straight as an arrow!

True, no denying that. You’re about as straight-laced as they come.

Alright then! Each Tarot card has its own meaning, so this time, I’m assigning each one an effect pedal!

So, just like with the guitar, bass, and accessory editions. Alright, take it away.

We’ll be working with the 22 Major Arcana cards from the Tarot deck.

At this point, I think everyone’s pretty familiar with these cards. By now, even our readers might’ve started memorizing them!

And as always, we’ll go in numerical order.

Got it. Let’s hear it!

Oh, just a heads-up—this is purely based on Kizuhiko’s personal interpretation. Let’s start with Card 0.

The Adventurer, right?

Exactly. But, you see, it also represents being ‘eccentric’, which always leads me to introducing something offbeat or unusual right off the bat!

Well... yeah, like last time when we skipped it in the accessories edition.

So, let me start with Card 1 instead this time!

Same as before, huh? Fine, go ahead.

Card 1: The Magician

What’s a magical effect pedal?

A delay, of course!
BOSS / DD-8 Digital Delay

Back in high school, I remember a friend playing a dotted-eighth delay riff for me. I was amazed and thought, “Whoa, it’s like magic!”

I see... though, to be fair, all effect pedals feel like magic when you’re just starting out.

Right? And BOSS’s digital delay has been a classic for ages. I can’t believe it’s already up to DD-8! Back when I was a student, the DD-3 was the latest model.

Time flies, doesn’t it? As a bassist, I’ve never really used delays much, though.

Next up is Card 2: The High Priestess! Representing intellect and skill.

So, what’s the pick?

Something that screams, “It gets the job done!”

Makes sense. Though, you could say that about a lot of things...

Oh, come on! Let’s just say it’s something tech-savvy, like this:
Mooer / Preamp Model X2

A preamp! Affordable yet seems super capable.

Now for Card 3: The Empress. A symbol of glamour and popularity.

Glamorous? What’s the pedal equivalent of that?

This one!
Providence / VLC-1 Velvet Comp

Wait, a compressor? Isn’t that a bit plain?

Ah, but you see, the Empress card also represents ‘beauty’.

Huh?

A compressor smooths and evens out your sound. Kind of like foundation in makeup—giving you a silky, velvet-like complexion!

Uh... if you say so? That’s a bit of a stretch, though!

Moving on! Card 4 is The Emperor. A symbol of strong leadership.

Strong... as in distortion?

That could work, but what about emphasizing the dignity and gravitas of a king?
BOSS / OC-5 Octave

Adding those lower octaves gives the sound more weight and authority. Makes sense!

Card 5 is The Hierophant, symbolizing trust and respect.

Trust?

Here it is!
Electro-Harmonix / Cathedral -Stereo Reverb-

Uh, I’m not sure about that one.

When you think of The Hierophant, you think of churches, right? The teachings of the Hierophant echo throughout the church, resonating in the heart and mind!

Ah, so it’s like a cathedral?

Heh heh.

But this one’s discontinued, so let’s go with something else.

Here you go! It even has Holy in the name, which sounds similar to your name Horry. Electro-Harmonix / Holy Grail Plus Reverb
Electro-Harmonix / Holy Grail Plus Reverb

Sure, but technically, the spelling is different... but whatever!

Next, we have the card of two lovers, The Lovers.

What does it symbolize?

A flanger!
Maxon / Vintage Jet Riser

And the reasoning behind that?

It’s like the feeling of love, where you get dizzy with emotion or suddenly feel your energy rise, just like a jet sound! It’s love-like, don’t you think?

Hmm... that’s a bit of a stretch...

Personally, I’ve never bought just a flanger by itself.

You wouldn’t know love, would you? But yeah, nowadays it’s usually found in multi-effects, I suppose. It’s often grouped with filter effects. I used to use the Boss one back in the day as a sort of special effect.

Ah, yes, definitely had that special effect vibe. Moving on! Card 7 is The Chariot.

The car image?

No, I think the Centaur would be perfect!

Ah, Centaur. But that’s already a ‘legendary’ effect, right?

True. I think you can still find clones of it at Sound House, but... let’s go with this one!
Fender / The Pinwheel Rotary Speaker Emulator

Interesting.

A rotary speaker that spins like a wheel!

I see. Well, I’ll accept that one!

Next up, card number 8: Strength.

Strength...

Finally, it’s time for a distortion!

BOSS / DS-1X Distortion

Oh, this is the one you love, right?

YES! I love the powerful yet juicy tone of the DS-1X.

Juicy... isn’t that about power?

Well, moving on, card number 9 is... The Hermit.

Isn’t that someone who’s retired?

Yeah, someone with no desires.

We’re not quite like that, having bought so much new gear in the early part of 2022!
See: “Active Band Man Chats - My New Gear to Jumpstart 2022!” for reference.

We’re not withered yet!

That’s one way to put it.

Since we’re devoid of desires... we need something that sets limits, a limiter!
BOSS / LMB-3 Bass Limiter

Oh, finally, a bass effect! Though it’s a bit understated. Still, it’s important. But... isn’t it because we have desires that we need a limiter?

(Ignoring that) Moving on to card number 10: Wheel of Fortune, a card that represents opportunities!

So... what does that mean?

Here!
Electro-Harmonix / Ring Thing

?

It’s a ring modulator!

Ah, I see, a play on ‘ring’!

You’re getting good at this! Next up, card number 11: Justice!

Justice?

Balance and fairness! So, here’s something to balance your frequencies:
MXR / M108S 10 Band Graphic EQ

Graphic EQ! No objections there.

Now for card 12: The Hanged Man. A man with his feet bound and hanging upside down! A symbol of patience.

What would a ‘patience’ effect be?

Here!
TC Electronic / Ditto Stereo Looper

A looper?

It patiently repeats the same phrase!

Well, since it’s a machine... it’s not exactly ‘patiently’ repeating, is it? And it’s not really an effect either...

Next up! The ominous number 13, Death.

Scary! It’s holding a scythe.

If we’re talking about blades, this one fits!

Which one?

Electro-Harmonix / Superego Sampler/Slicer

Slicer?

Something that slices the sound...?

Hmm, there are quite a few effects that are unfamiliar to bassists, aren’t there?

True. Now, moving on to number 14: Temperance.

Temperance?

It represents self-control, moderation, and a kind, devoted heart.

As for an effect... what would that be?

How about something that gently envelops?
MXR / M234 Analog Chorus

Chorus... Since it’s analog, it definitely sounds warm and inviting!

Number 15 is The Devil!

Here it is!

When you think of a devilish effect, what comes to mind?

What could it be?

Something that makes you shiver with fear!
BOSS / VB-2W Waza Craft Vibrato

Vibrato, huh.

Shaky... Now, number 16 is another scary one, The Tower.

The Tower?

Actually, this is considered the worst card! A destructive effect, and here it is!
Rowin / Crush Bit Bit Crusher

A bit crusher! Truly ‘destructive’!

Number 17 is The Star! A sparkling image, a symbol of youth.

What about the effect?

Let’s go with this one!
Digitech / Whammy5 Whammy Pedal

?

Let me explain! If you raise the pitch by two octaves, you’ll feel like you can touch the stars in the night sky!

So romantic! Wait, what? This reasoning is so far-fetched, it’s impressive.

Thank you for the compliment! Alright, final stretch! Number 18 is The Sun.

A warm-sounding one?

Here it is!
BOSS / SD-1 Overdrive

Ah, BOSS pedals always bring a sense of calm.

Yes! Number 19 is The Moon.

Moon. For an effect, what would it be?

Electro-Harmonix / Silencer

?? A noise gate?

It gives the image of a quiet moonlit night.

I see... when you look at it this way, Electro-Harmonix does have a lot of unique names. Their naming sense is brilliant.

Yeah, right? Now! Number 20 is Judgment!

What does that mean?

It’s a card representing strong luck and decisions!

Is there an effect for that?

This one!
TC Electronic / Polytune 3 Polyphonic Tuner

A tuner? What’s the connection?

Tuning—it’s essentially one of the most important decisions, isn’t it?

Ah... I see. And it’s a Polytune?

If one string is out of tune, your fate could be off too...

Well, I suppose that’s true... though it’s not really an effect.

Here’s the final one! Number 21 is The World.

It’s the best card, right?

Yes! This is definitely for that piece of equipment that changed the world of effects!

What’s that?

Kemper Profiling Amplifier / Profiler Stage Floor Type

That’s kind of cheating, isn’t it?

It’s a cheat piece of gear, for sure. But I’d love to try it out at least once.

Phew, we made it through! Wait... did we skip number 0?

Ah... can’t help it. Number 0 is the Fool. So, it means we should challenge ourselves with an effect we’ve never tried before!

So, it’s basically the same thing! But you know, with unfamiliar effects, you might come up with phrases you’d never think of otherwise. For example, it might be a good idea to play around with the presets on a multi-effects pedal.

Yeah, definitely. These days, there are a lot of affordable ones too. And we’re sinking deeper and deeper into the effects gear swamp... So, because everything is?

For love!